more idioms.
more [here].
because sometimes enough isn’t enough.
there are other fish in the sea
this feels like the point at which my account gets demonetised. well, joke’s on you, assholes, because i don’t make any money anyway.
other fish sounds like it could be a tinder-alternative for those poor unfortunates who have just come out of long-term relationships, soft-bodied and vulnerable, like hermit crabs moving homes. i suppose it already exists. it’s called tinder.
actions speak louder than words
It was a pleasure to burn. It was a special pleasure to see things eaten, to see things blackened and changed. With the brass nozzle in his fists, with this great python spitting its venomous kerosene upon the world, the blood pounded in his head, and his hands were the hands of some amazing conductor playing all the symphonies of blazing and burning to bring down the tatters and charcoal ruins of history.
ray bradbury – fahrenheit 451
i have a love-hate relationship with writing, as with most things, only more so. i’m ok with that. the author, journalist, film critic etc., renata adler defined a writer as ‘somebody who hates to write’. sometimes i do feel like a writer, sometimes i don’t, and sometimes is enough, sometimes.
the word fuck a hundred times
fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck
fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck
fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck
fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck
fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck
fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck
fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck
fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck
fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck
fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck
fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck
fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck
fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck
fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck
fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck
fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck
fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck
fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck
fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck
fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck
an apple a day keeps the doctor away
would you adam and eve it? more apple-based idioms.
this particular insult comes courtesy of the tv series what we do in the shadows, an occasionally brilliant and frequently hilarious twenty-minuter, and source of some of the most exquisite burns on television. i just wish i’d written more of them down.
as an actual doctor (of philosophy), it’s ok for me to draw this sort of comic. i don’t deliberately court controversy, like some second-rate social-media algorithm. i just find this shit funny, and i enjoy poking sacred cows with sticks (metaphorically), and pointing out blatant hypocrisy when i see it, my own included.
i feel like i’m the only person watching this thank you nhs performative gratitude wank parade and wondering what the fuck happened. hello? what the fuck? it’s like i’m at a fucking party convention circa 1939 waiting for the other guys to stop clapping. if you really gave a shit, you wouldn’t be pissing all over it.
oh, and fuck the queen too. and charlie.
a penny for your thoughts
this one’s weird and i’m not sure i like it. i do think about this shit most of the time though, that much is true.
good things come to those who wait
if this seems familiar, that’s because you read my previous post, and i recycled this image. either that or i unconsciously copied it from somewhere. or there’s a limit on how unfamiliar a simple desk and stretching silhouette can actually be.
anyway, i decided it looked better without the text, but this was too good just to go back on the pile. i think, in several respects, being a pornstar is similar to being a writer. i often consider telling people that i’m an adult entertainer, when they ask what it is i ‘do’.
it’s easier to explain than this.
finally, it behoves me here to direct your attention to the greatest television commercial of all time – surfer. directed by jonathan glazer, the genius auteur responsible for under the skin, one of my all-time favourite films, narrated in a deep scottish brogue, to the sound of leftfield’s phat planet, surfer is a minute or more of minimalist monochrome magnificence. it frequently gets voted the best advert of all time, and nonwithstanding my natural inclination to swim against the tide and shit all over anything so widely popular, particularly a fucking plug, a beer ad no less – i have to agree. this shit is art.