high functioning

user defined function

you get the idea.

cognitive function

and that word is…

quadratic function

… fingering.

consumption function

i am completely incapable of controlling computers when i’m high. something always goes wrong – why? it’s like when i’m stoned i emit a different electromagnetic signature; one that’s harmful to complex electronic devices such as laptops and phones. 

it doesn’t help that almost all modern apps are a pile of steaming shit. either you learn a whole sign-language of non-intuitive gestures or every basic control is fifty clicks deep down a fucking vertical dot dot dot. what was wrong with drop-down menus? am i getting old?

i hope a global EMP wipes out all technology some day soon. it’ll be worth the war and famine and civilisational collapse just to be rid of these shitty apps. 

social function

willpower, that is, to do shit that i don’t want to do.

when it comes to doing stuff that i do want to do; stoned, i’m fucking indefatigable.

hash function

don’t ask me to explain it.

functional unit

this is the point at which my relationship with drugs started to get complicated.

being depressed strips you of yourself. and when you start to stop being depressed you have to make it up as you go along. nothing remains from before.

functional illiteracy

this can sometimes happen too, on rare occasions.

functional magnetic resonance imagery

this is more likely. lately, though, not so much.

i’m feeling good. i’m not sure why. and i haven’t so much as blown a bubble in weeks.


… if you’re not enough without it, you’ll never be enough with it.

Irving ‘Irv’ Blitzer – Cool Runnings (1993)

lung function

still, there’s a reason i fuck with this shit.

it’s something to do with thinking differently.

thinking about thinking differently.

probability density function

try this.

think about
not thinking about
not thinking

don’t think
don’t not think

what are you doing?

are you thinking
or not

thinking about thinking
not thinking about thinking

thinking about not thinking
not thinking about not thinking

or not thinking

pseudo function

because fuck realistic life plans

i’m here to dream

i’m here to smoke weed and write
and write about smoking weed

function room

i was put on this erf
to smoke poetry
and write weed
and i'm all out of poetry